Saturday, December 09, 2006

A personal note

I realize that I've expressed some pretty strong opinions on this site about the divorce. If I've offended anyone it was unintentional. As the oldest child of two divorced parents who do not co-operate and didn't very well even when they were married, I suppose I'm very sensitive and very much aware of the pain it causes everyone, and the extra stress and responsibility it means for the children. My dad isn't perfect, but my mother unfairly blames him for everything, and she's not perfect either. So you better believe that it created a pretty strong reaction in me to see Britney file for divorce in a way that seemed very cavalier and insensitive, and to see a headline on People that said "Eight weeks after the birth of her second child, the singer dumps her hard-partying husband - Britney files for divorce!" Then to see people cheering and laughing at the way Kevin was caught off-guard was really difficult for me to see. So if I seem to take it personally that the divorce isn't being handled as well as it could be, maybe I am. I'm far too aware of what some of the people involved are probably feeling, and what they will feel in the future if Kevin and Britney are unable to work well together.

However, Kevin and Britney are not my parents, and things will not necessarily work out the same way. Kevin really seems more or less okay, especially the last few times we've seen him. I'm happy to see him focusing on his career and spending so much time with his family and friends. I'm not as sure about Britney. Not because I believe all of the rumors about her, but I would have liked to have seen at least one picture of her with someone in her family by now. It's good to get out there and meet new people and make new friends, but at a time like this I think it's better to surround yourself with people who really know you and can support you, and don't have any vested interest. I've always thought of Britney as the Marilyn Monroe of our time, she's such a star and she has that same quality that makes people either hate her or want to put their arm around her and be her friend. I just don't want her to be like Marilyn in all ways. I hope as she gets older she'll be more like Madonna and be able to stay strong.

I think I will always have an interest in Kevin, Britney, Sean Preston, Jayden James, and even Shar, Kori, Kaleb, Donnie, and Cassie. I had hoped to see Kevin and Britney in an long and successful marriage, but it wasn't meant to be I guess. So I wish them all well as they sort through their new lives and I hope they "live long and prosper".

19 comments:

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Anonymous said...

i'm happy there are people out there who did not jump on the bandwagon and cheer that britney divorced kevin, especially in the insensitive way that she did. thanks for making this site and letting kevin fans show their support!!

~kaylin

Anonymous said...

Alison,

We want our superstars to be perfect at everything they do. We want them to be folks we can look up to.

But in reality, they have perhaps one small facet of their lives that they excel at. For everything else they are just regular people, and sometimes their great talent in one area is camoflage for the things they can't do.

They put their underwear on one leg at a time, when they wear them, just like we do.

Don't beat yourself up. Your blog is informative, and for the most part upbeat.

Marcia

Anonymous said...

the point is that these two evolved primates are entertaining us with their antics....



the conspiracy theorist

Anonymous said...

I'd just say don't let you mommy issues reflect on Britney. While you are very fair about Kevin you are totally biased and too hard on Britney. Learn that if the press is lying about Kevin and you refuse to believe it chances are that they are lying about Britney too. You are free to do what you want of course, but when you pick and choose what to believe you have no credibility. Bottom line, the press did the celebration for Britney. Yes she contributed, but to blame it all of her is not fair. As you can see as soon as they thought she celebrated too much they were back on her case. I would find out the truth and reserve judgment for a lot of things.

Anonymous said...

no, it was as soon as she started going places w/o any underwear on (not just once) that the backlash began, and then they started speculating that if shes going out all the time, whos taking care of her kids?

plus, who divorces someone thru a text msg?? or your spouse has to hear it from someone else who heard it from the media? what she did was really insensitive and ill-planned out. i didn't like her when she was just britney spears, the popqueen, but i did like her when she was britney spears, the supportive wife who was always encouraging her husband and standing up for him when the media lashed out at him. she needs to get back to being that person (and drop paris) and settle this divorce in a more civilized manner.

india said...

How in the hell do you people know Brit was letting Kevin know of the divorce via text message?? There was never any real, or true sources behind that. They just claimed Kevin learned through text message because he was sitting there reading his messages while looking miserable. That doesn't mean Brit let him know of the divorce through a text message.

The majority were supportive of Brit's decision to divorce Kevin. It wasn't up until her partying when people started lashing out on her so harshly, and rudely.

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr. Conspiracy Theorist:
" the point is that these two evolved primates are entertaining us with their antics...."

Ok. most of the time you are harsh, but there is honesty in your declaration. It really is about our entertainment, and we take the information, the crazy pictures, and we try and sort fact from fiction, and we do it for entertainment, to give us a diversion from our own lives of quiet desperation.

Marcia

Anonymous said...

A whole lot of what we read is speculation and made-up stories, devised to separate us from our hard earned money-but the tabloid, buy the hype, buy someone's warped sense of journalism.

We sort somethings out as pure trash, and hold up something to be true, with just as little proof.

The text message mystique has just as little evidence of being truth as the stories of Ms. Porn queen. We associated events and film footage and ran with partial information.

Anonymous said...

There might have been a text message-but that is certainly not all of their communication!

Their pictures for years have shown two struggling folks, dressed like any low rent Americans, red neck trucker's caps and ghetto wear. Many times the pictures are obviously posed and staged for the cameras.

This relationship had run it's course. It was a short term relationship complicated by marriage and children.

Anonymous said...

We don't know if Britney ended the relationship with a text message. For all we know, she wanted Federline to find out watching the news. All we do know is that it was done in a sneaky manner by her.

Anonymous said...

How do we know that it was done in a sneaky manner? No one knows for certain people! She could have told him and he just wrote it off as her being upset. Agian, it goes both ways. She very well could have been a witch and let it be a surprise, but looking back on the last 4 ish months of their relationship...it didn't look good.

How can you not know when your spouse is so unhappy unless you aren't paying attention.

Agian, she was out looking at houses for sale when she was in her last trimester. I know that if I were out looking at new houses, epecially if we just finished with the one we were living in and my husband saw pics, he would have beem like "What is going on? Let's go see someone and talk it out."

To sit and say "The manner in which she filed for divorce was crappy" is ignorant as no one knows how it really happened. Yes, I am aware that he was still talking sweet about her up until the divorce papers were filed in court, but could he not have been thinking..."hey she's upset with me so I'm gonna make nice" or "I can't say anything bad, even if we are having problems b/c then it won't look good."

Anonymous said...

One writer said "We don't know if Britney ended the relationship with a text message... All we do know is that it was done in a sneaky manner by her."

I think that's nothing but trash journalism.

How do we know that? What if they had a fight about his work and she said "I want to go with you!" And he said "no, I have to do this on my own, they don't take me seriously when I'm with you" and the fight escalated to yelling at each other. He was upset becuase the media picks at him, making him sound like a gigilo and not a serious talent. She's upset in part because she knows his "circle of friends" and knew he's with them if he went out alone. He slams the door and leaves, saying, like he did for the record "because sometimes when me and the wife are beefin' I have to get away, [and go to Vegas] (of all the God awful places to go)

Note: Very poor choice on his part, certainly it's appropriate to go somewhere to chill if you have a fight, but get real. No spouse will think Vegas is a good idea.

Her mother, alarmed at the fact that her once cheerful, beautiful daughter had to resort to anti-depressants because of effects their high volume adrenline unhealthy Jerry Springer-type relationship (Get out, no stay) was having on her, encouraged an intervention. She gathered some people who knew her at the height of her career, when she was happy.

Later, he received a text message saying that this time she was serious, not just going to have his car taken away, not going to lock up his toys, tired of his spending money, partying in Vegas with his "circle of friends", tired of the embarrassing rumors and this time she was through. Done. divo U.

This story also fits with the circumstances. If it did happen in a text message, when two people can't be civil to each other in person it's got to be done some way.

Anonymous said...

since britney is the popqueen and the sugarmommy, it makes a lot of sense that she'll try to get her way with everything and when kevin wont let her, she'll threaten him w/ divorce or taking away his toys, and in this case, its his kids. she'll do everything she can to show him whos the boss in this relationship, b/c shes britney spears.

i'm so glad hes freed from her. shes not funny, not cute, and definitely cannot sing; i don't see why anyone could like her.


~kaylin

Anonymous said...

While with some I could see the "power" struggle, but from what we know and have seen (chaotic and what his friends and hell, her friends say) he didn't let her push him around...there goes the "she's on a power trip" to show him just what she is capable of.

Obviously, she isn't "keeping the kids away" as he has said and it has been reported he saw his children a few times since he has been back in LA. If she was trying to keep the kids away from him as some of you are suggesting, she wouldn't let him visit them.

She has every right to take away everything that is hers ie: what she paid for is legally hers unless otherwise stated. It's not being mean or showing "whose the boss." It's taking your things, physical and otherwise, and getting out of a situation you can no longer live in happily.

Anonymous said...

Well said.

Anonymous said...

I think that the power struggle theory fits. It also indicates two people who couldn't make it work, whose time was over. It fits what the better "tabloid" magazines are printing ( People)

As far as the media, when you stop getting attention, you're out. Even if they are writing controversy, it's because there are interested readers.

I, for one.

Marcia

Anonymous said...

I like the power-struggle theory. It seemed like when Kevin first starting recorded he was like I want to be my own person and show everyone the Kevin I was before Britney and wants it to be his own thing. Yet when his album is released it really doesn't live up to what he originally said. Most of the tracks brag about his wife and being a superstar and how are people going to find him credible when he is spewing out a lifestyle that he obtained through his wife. He gets mad and Brit reacts, don't communicate for a while, Brit files for divorce.

Anonymous said...

From Chaotic they seemed like they had a love/hate relationship one second they are fighting the next they are having sex. If the rest of their relationshp was anything like that, it wouldn't be healthy for a children to grow up in a environment like that. I have a few friends who wish they're parents would divorce just because they fight all the time and the environment is crappy. It was more of a lustful relationship than real love. People think they found their soulmate a lot and once they break up realize that it was for the best and their is better for them.